Simone Claims Right To Name F Captain
Sunday Paddle Czar cites nickname, king maker, as sole authority to replace Gorman
Subcommittee finds no such office; nickname traced to his own text
Simone declined to say who granted the title
By Anita Bath·Staff Reporter
Andrew Simone, outside the Rowayton hut Saturday, claims a third title since Labor Day — a new one roughly every twelve days.
“Yes, it's my decision. They like to call me king maker.”
ROWAYTON, Conn., Oct. 3 —Andrew Simone said Saturday that naming Chris Gorman's successor as captain of Rowayton F is his decision alone, citing his authority as the club's Sunday Paddle Czar and a nickname he said the membership has given him: king maker.
Asked whether the pick runs through any process, Mr. Simone was unambiguous. "Yes, it's my decision," he wrote. "They like to call me king maker." He did not elaborate on who 'they' are, and did not respond to a follow-up question asking him to name one of them.
The vacancy opened last week when Mr. Gorman resigned the F captaincy, an exit he conducted, as he has each of his resignations, with the gravity of a head of state, saying it required consultation with "my family, my representatives, and absolutely nobody at the FCPTL." Rowayton F plays Sundays in Division 10.
Mr. Simone has now held, created, or claimed three titles since Labor Day, by one internal count: Sunday Paddle Czar, captain of Rowayton E, and, as of this weekend, king maker. That is a new title roughly every twelve days.
No office of the Rowayton Paddle Club recognizes a position called Sunday Paddle Czar, according to a member of the club's bylaws subcommittee, who was granted anonymity because he was not authorized to discuss Mr. Simone's titles on the record. He said he had gone through the club's governing documents twice and found the phrase "king maker" only in a group text, where it appeared to have been typed by Mr. Simone himself.
Rowayton F has gone eight days without a captain, the longest vacancy at any level of the club this season, the same subcommittee member said.
Mr. Gorman, for his part, said he has no appetite for relitigating who fills the seat he just left. "I'm out," he said. "I don't love that 'king maker' is now a sentence somebody can say out loud, but it's not my mitt to hold anymore." He said his exit had nothing to do with Mr. Simone casting, in his words, a shadow over the whole operation, and reiterated that the sun has never been a problem for him at any age.
Mr. Simone, who captains Rowayton E and calls it the top Sunday team and the reigning Sunday champs, said the F decision would be made with the same rigor he brings to his other sides. He declined to say when he would announce a successor, or to whom the title of Sunday Paddle Czar had been granted, by whom, or in what form.
He was still wearing the oven mitt Saturday when he said the pick would be his.
